The De-Magicizing of Christmas

Christmas used to be a magical time of the year. And, when I say magical, I mean it in every sense of the word. Not only was it a time that was special and unique, but there was also an actual "magical" feeling to the whole thing. Santa Claus is, of course, magical but it was also a time when wishes came true. Most of the wishes were in the form of presents, but it was still something really cool. You could get all the gifts you'd dreamed of...plus all the ones you hadn't had the creativity to dream of.

Now, Christmas is Christmas. It's a time to be with loved ones and get some new stuff. A lot of times, you know what you're getting, and you're occasionally re-opening stuff you bought for yourself. Tomorrow is Christmas, and I'm pretty sure I know exactly what I'm getting. And, as far as things I'm looking forward to getting, there's only a couple of things.

And that's sad to me. Christmas used to be a really cool time of the year. And while there's still that anticipation that it's going to be the same as it used to be, it hasn't delivered those same feelings in a really long time. I'm sure things will be different when I have kids, but in this middle stage of my life, it's really just depressing to think about. And it all comes down to a few factors.

1. The magic is gone. Like I said earlier, Christmas was shrouded in magic. You'd believe that Santa Claus was out there watching you, knowing exactly what would make you happy on Christmas morning. He was like a guardian angel, making sure that all the good boys and girls were rewarded. Christmas, of course, is a religious holiday, but it's a completely different feeling for little kids. Because they actually get their "heaven" one day every year, where they're rewarded for being good all year. They "pray" to Santa and get what they asked for if they deserve it. Perhaps, Christmas is the opiate of young kids.

2. Work. Christmas was really cool because you got time off from school. And not a three-day weekend or even a week like on Spring Break. You get weeks off - plural. You get to stay up late, go see movies, and do sleepovers on weekdays. And, after Christmas, you get to play with all your cool new toys and show your friends.

Now, I get one day off - Christmas day. Some people get Christmas Eve off, but a lot of people don't. And if you work in Corporate America, you might be able to use vacation time, but it's usually used by management who have seniority over you. So Christmas is just a day off...nothing special.

3. No more wishes. When you're a kid, you have all these things that you want. Specific action figures that your friends will be jealous of. Movies that you haven't seen since they were in theaters. A new bike. Even simple things like a football.

When you're an adult, you have money and access to whatever you want. If you want a movie, you don't have to wait until Christmas to get it. You drive to the store, hand the dude your credit card, and it's done. If you want a bike, go buy one. All the wishes you had are spread out over the course of the year...to the point where, on Christmas, there's not really anything you want. Even if you get the idea of getting something on December 15, you're probably more likely to go get it then instead of asking someone for it or buying it and wrapping it for Christmas.

And there's less stuff you want. New clothes are the staple...along with the ever-present gift cards. Most of the things we spend money on (cars, vacations, housing) aren't really "Christmas gift" things. And even simple things like movies are readily accessible now with premium cable showing movies 24/7 and things like Netflix. Why buy a DVD when you can watch the movie whenever you want from several different media?

4. The payoff. Christmas morning was really cool because you'd wake up and see all this cool stuff that Santa brought (AKA, things too big to wrap). Then you get to open presents. Then...the payoff. You get to call your friends and tell them all the cool stuff you got. And go outside and show the neighbor kids. And then go hang out with your friends and see what they got.

Now, you have a bunch of gift cards, stuff you bought yourself, and clothes. You're not going to call your friend and tell them you got $25 at Best Buy. You're not going to tell them you bought some movie that you both have already seen. And you're not going to show up at his house, showing off your brand-new sweater.

When you're done, you just clean up all the wrapping paper and put everything away. It's over before you know it, and it just feels like a letdown. Especially if you try and fool yourself into thinking that the magic is coming back. That you'll get something that everyone will be jealous of. Or, like when you were a kid, something you didn't even know you wanted.

And I guess this is the time when you're supposed to look beyond the "childish" parts of Christmas. When it's not about the presents anymore, it should be about the meaning behind Christmas. The religious parts, being nice to your fellow man, and all that stuff. Which, I suppose is my assignment for this Christmas.

But it's hard not to remember what things used to be. Especially for someone like me, who finds yesterday always better than today. And as someone who is still desperately hoping that magic exists in our world, it's always sad to remember all the magic that's been lost over the years.

Not a very happy Christmas message...but maybe thinking about it will help us find it all again.

Why the Hate?

I was driving into work the other day when I saw a car with three bumper stickers. I only remember two of them, but they all had the same theme.

- "1/20/13 - The End of An Error"
- "Proud of My Country, Ashamed of My President"
- Something else anti-Obama

And I couldn't help but giggle in confusion. Giggling because I can guarantee that three years ago, this guy would've vehemently argued that similar bumper stickers would've been worthy of treason charges. "You have to support your president!" Because you gotta think this guy had one of those "W: My President" bumper stickers on his car a few years ago.

Why is it okay to be ashamed of one president when you had to honor the last one? Because one wears a blue tie and one wears a red one.

I was confused...because what has Obama done to draw up so much hate? Bush, at the very least, started a war. When people die, other people get emotional. I can understand that, particularly when you start looking at the connections between George W. and his father. There's obviously more connection to the first Gulf War than to September 11. That would make people angry, and perhaps a bit ashamed.

But Obama? Isn't the biggest (and, from what I can see, the most apt) argument against Obama is that he isn't doing anything? So what has he done to draw hatred?

- Win the election?
- Win the Nobel Peace Prize?
- Be black?

Is it health care? The platform that was compromised to death and almost certainly will never pass in any form recognizable to the president. It can't be that, right?

What is it then? Are people mad that he isn't getting things done, despite the fact that the things he would be doing are liberal? It can't be that, right? Because you gotta think that this is a godsend for conservatives....they have a man in the office who is a strong liberal who had two years of a liberal Congress...and hasn't done a thing yet. At this point in Bush's presidency, we were already in two wars.

Can't we just pick a president that one side likes and the other side is okay with? Or are we too divided now? Where, no matter what, we're supposed to hate people from the other side? Where no one rallies around the president anymore, no matter what he does? Where we get mad at your guy because you were mean to our guy last time?

If that's the case, I think more people will become disillusioned to politics. Because if it's all about emotion, you're only going to have emotional people involved. And then nothing gets done.

Dream Analysis

So last night, I forgot to actually analyze the dream that I described. And, at the same time, explain why I would randomly describe a dream that I had. And the reason I did was the randomness of it, combined with the subtle fears I have, with some interesting plot twists.

I've always been fascinated with dreams. The idea that our bodies are resting but our brains are active is very interesting to me. And dreams seem so mystical - they tell us stories that we weren't aware we could tell. Do they give us warnings for the future? Explanations of the mysteries of the past? Realizations for the present? Could they be messages from God? Or even messages from yourself? Or are they just random channel surfing your brain does waiting for you to wake up?

This dream has a lot to work with. My fear of having my home invaded is one of my biggest, and it was the "scariest" part of the dream for me. My car has already been stolen, and I'm always going to be worried about going out and finding the car not there. I also like that, even in my dreams, I'm a terrible shot.

But then there are the plot twists. The fact that my prime suspects ended up being my allies. The fact that the villain ended up being a voodoo Haitian. The fact that my old car - not the new one - was found.

Is there anything to take from this? Should I not move into a duplex? If I move into the neighborhood of a Haitian voodoo master, should I get better protection for my car? If my car gets stolen, should I forget the police and befriend the sketchy guys down the street?

My brain is weird. I've always known that. But this was just a weird story, and I felt like I needed to tell it.

My Dream - A Narrative

*Note - this is the plot of my actual dream from last night.*

I'm living in a duplex in a relatively sketchy part of town. I come out of the duplex one day to find out that my car has been stolen. Or, more accurately, it has been switched with another crappier car. In my dream, I remember that my car has already been stolen once (which is true).

I call the police, and they point me in the direction of some people that live down the street. Outside of that, there's nothing that they can do.

So I know that these people down the street might have stolen my car, and I'm a bit afraid of them. I get more afraid when I find out that someone has broken into my duplex. I call the police again, and they're even less helpful this time. I now assume that these people down the street are out to get me, but I can't do anything about it.

Eventually, I'm sitting in my duplex, and I know these people are right outside. They open the door, and I'm nervously in the corner. They come in smiling and tell me that they're not the ones who stole my car. In fact, they've come over to help me get my car back.

And it's actually not my new car that they're going to help get back. It's my old car - the one stolen in real life. Apparently, the car was stolen by a Haitian voodoo guy who lives in the neighborhood.

We go to his big mansion-like house at night as a bunch of people in a zombie-like trance are walking in. He has guards grabbing people who aren't in a zombie state, and so we have to pretend to be in a trance to get in. We get in, and I'm seated directly next to the Haitian boss. Some sort of raw fish is served, and I have to eat it as if I'm still in a trance.

Whatever the plan is works, and my new friends do something that makes everyone run away from the house in fear. I meet back up with them, and they throw me a gun.

I fire three shots at something and I miss every time.

And that's when I woke up.

Quandry

How come, between the hours of 7am and 8pm, all I want to do is sleep?

And, yet, between the hours of 8pm and midnight, all I want to do is watch random clips on Hulu?

A Short Story

"I'd like to say that this is a coincidence, but I don't believe in coincidences. I believe that everything that's happened in my life led me here. And the same applies to you. Everything you've ever done has led you to this moment.

And I'm here for one reason and one reason only. I'm going to tell you something, but I'm not here to tell you. I've told you a hundred times in my head, and I will continue to do it until the day I day. But this moment isn't about what I do. I have to see you reaction to what I say. I've seen you react in every way that a person can react. You've been overjoyed. You've been angry. You've ordered champagne and thrown water in my face. But all the other scenarios don't matter. All those other versions of you don't matter. The only thing that matters is you in this moment. As far as I'm concerned, nothing else exists.

I love you. I loved you from the moment I saw you. I loved you as we teased each other. As we grew closer. As we grew apart. I could see it, and you could see it. Everyone saw it. But nothing happened. I couldn't say what I needed to say, and you stopped waiting. You had enough, and I understand. It kills me, but I understand.

So what would you do if I told you I loved you? I know you can't do anything about it - that moment has passed, and we can't turn back time. But you have to know. You have to understand the pain and anguish that have led me to where I am. And while we will never be, you have to know.

In some other life, we were great. We were perfect. We were the envy of everyone else. Our love was the muse that led to masterpieces. The kind of love that few have but everyone yearns for. And, in that life, you're completely happy. Because, in my life, that's my only job. My only goal. My only concern. I've given you the world, and yet I still search for something greater.

You've found love in this life. And I'm sure it's a great love. And I'll find some myself. People live happy lives without ending up with the perfect person. Because human beings are adaptive creatures. Since we were tossed from the Garden, we've learned to accept less than perfect. Less than what we truly want. It's now hardwired into our DNA, and it's understandable. With all the problems that we face and all the evil we see, it's natural to hold on to whatever we can that can make us happy. After a long and hard day, a lot can disguise itself as perfect.

But I want you to know that we had it. It was for less than a second. Less than a moment. It would be hard to capture, even on the world's most sophisticated camera. It was small, but it existed. And because it existed, it can never be taken away. It will never go away. It will always exist, and we'll be able to go there whenever we want.

I've said what I needed to say. Done what I needed to do. Now it's your turn to let me know. What would you do if I told you I loved you?"

She looked up...

Plans

But little Mouse, you are not alone,
In proving foresight may be vain:
The best laid schemes of mice and men
Go often askew,
And leave us nothing but grief and pain,
For promised joy!

It's time to stop planning. And start doing.

TCU to the Rose Bowl

I haven't mentioned the Rose Bowl yet, but it's been about a week since TCU was formally invited to the "Granddaddy of Them All."

Am I upset that the Frogs didn't go to the National Title game? No, I'm not. People have said that TCU has done everything they were asked to do and still didn't get in. That, starting as high as they did, that this should have been the year for a non-BCS team to get in. That, in the absence of Florida and Alabama and Texas and Oklahoma and LSU and Michigan and Ohio State...this was the year to get it done.

But an SEC team was undefeated. A Pac-10 team was undefeated. And, in college football, that means that an SEC team is going to play a Pac-10 team in the championship. And I understand that.

If Auburn was 12-1, I might be upset. If Oregon was 11-1, I would definitely be upset. But two teams played in "bigger" conferences and did the same thing TCU did, and I think they deserved to go. I watched a lot of Oregon and Auburn in the last few weeks (for obvious reasons), and I think they're both good teams. The title game should be good.

The Rose Bowl will be very interesting. Wisconsin fans are basically declaring the game a blowout before it even begins, even though TCU is actually favored in the game. Wisconsin ran through their entire schedule, scoring a ridiculous amount of points in a few of their games. They also gave up a lot of points.

Two things to think about.

1. Wisconsin's Run Game vs. TCU's Defense - TCU will face, by far, their biggest challenge as far as a run game goes. The Badgers will run the ball until it hurts, and then they'll run it about 50 more times. At the same time, TCU will be the best defense that Wisconsin has faced, and they almost never allow people to run on them. A lot has been made of the size disparity between the Wisconsin O-Line and the TCU D-Line. I'm not sure it will be as "David vs. Goliath" as people are saying.

2. TCU's Offense vs. Wisconsin's Defense - Oh yeah, TCU has an offense too. TCU has a mature and experienced passing game with Andy Dalton and Jeremy Kerley, and when they're on, they're really hard to stop. And they have Ed Wesley, who might be the Frogs' best running back since a guy named Tomlinson was on campus. Again, Wisconsin has allowed people to score, but they did stop Terrelle Pryor.

I think it will be a great game, and the winner will probably end up at #2 in the final standings. I will be at the game, and I'm really looking forward to seeing how the Frogs react. They apparently felt cheated by last year's Boise game. Hopefully, they'll be ready to go in this one.

An Open Letter to the Clothing Industry

Good Morning,

I'm assuming that someone in the clothing industry reads this blog. If I'm correct, please pass this along to your president, emperor, or main dignitary when done reading.

I'm writing because I'm a little confused. When I'm doing my laundry, I'll often find the tag that tells me whether I should wash with hot water or cold water. I'm a pretty typical guy, and I'm not going to go too out of my way to wash my collection of polo shirts and t-shirts. But trying to be more adult, I figured I should at least follow instructions.

And for the majority of my clothes, the system works. Certain things have crazy extra requirements like turning a t-shirt with some kind of logo on it inside out. And I can do that, especially since t-shirts sometimes go inside out when I take them off anyway.

But I'm often distressed when I find the tag and don't see writing. I see these stupid symbols that I cannot decipher without assistance from the internet. And this is why I'm writing to you today..

I do my laundry early on Sunday morning. I do it Sunday because I grew up watching the NFL and Ashley grew up watching college. So he gets Saturday, I get Sunday. It's a system, and it works.

Early on Sunday morning, I want things to be simple. I have fantasy football to be concerned with and can't bother with your hieroglyphics. And to make matters worse, the main symbol I'm concerned with is in Celsius. Really, clothing industry? Now you want me to bring math into this? I need to take the temperature on the label, multiply it by 1.8, and then add 32? Really?

And 30 degrees Celsius means 86 degrees Fahrenheit. That, according to the internet, means cold. I realize the water on the "cold" setting is probably around that, but can't we use hyperbole for the issue of simplicity? Make 0 degrees Celsius mean cold? And 100 degrees mean hot? Who really cares how cold the water is when you're just going off "cold", "warm", or "hot"?

Please correct this with future clothes. Make it easy. And not for you - for me.

Sincerely,

Drew